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Early in January of 2004 I came to a crossroad in my
life. I was living away from my family and going to college. I began
to isolate myself from my friends. I remember lying in bed one night and
coming to the realization that if I didn’t do something about my life now, I
would lose it. I could see that I was stumbling blindly into more
darkness. I decided to pack up my bags and move home to my family. I wanted
to begin a search for some meaning in my life.
Choosing to move back home proved to be a smart decision. Living with my
family, I stopped using drugs. But I still felt worthless. My mind and heart
where filled with regret and guilt. About a month after I had moved home I
heard about an upcoming movie about Jesus that was coming to theaters. It
was a film surrounded by controversy and I quickly became very interested in
seeing it. Something, somewhere was telling me to see this film.
Seeing The Passion of the Christ
It’s interesting to think back, because I actually knew before I
went to see this film that it would change my life! Growing up in a
non-religious home, Christmas was about Santa Claus and Easter was about the
Easter Bunny. I knew very little about the Christian faith and Jesus. I
knew that Jesus was crucified but I didn’t know why.
In early March I went to see the movie The Passion of the Christ with
my parents. I have never experienced emotions like the ones I felt as I
watched that movie. I was clenching the arm rest of my chair, sobbing,
and shaking. What I was seeing was true and I couldn’t deny the compassion
that touched my heart. I saw Jesus for the first time on that screen.
I left the theater stunned, feeling numb, overwhelmed and anxious.
My parents wanted to discuss the film but I couldn’t. I didn’t want to talk
to anyone. That night, before I went to sleep, I talked to Jesus for the
first time. I didn’t know how to pray. I didn’t know anything about God
or religion but I knew when I spoke to Jesus that night I felt this
overwhelming sense of peace. I cried and prayed and then fell into a
deep, peaceful sleep.
Asking Questions about Jesus
The next day I wanted to know everything about Jesus so I went to buy a
Bible. I knew that I could find all the answers to my questions in that
book. When I purchased my Bible, I asked the store clerk about church. I
wanted to know where I should go and what groups I should join. She was kind
enough to give me some great suggestions.
I started reading my Bible in the New Testament with the Gospel of Matthew.
I powered through it in seven days! Initially, I had so many questions. As
I read I found that the questions began answering themselves.
I was browsing http://www.thelife.com,
a web site designed around ‘The Passion’ movie and I read an article called
“Are you looking for forgiveness?” I certainly was looking for
forgiveness! I needed forgiveness from others and forgiveness from
myself. Before I read this article, I didn’t believe that I could ever
be forgiven. I prayed this prayer for the first time:
"God, thank you for what You have done for me. I believe You sent Jesus
to die for my sins. I believe Jesus rose again to give me everlasting
life. Please forgive me for the wrong things I have done. Please give me
a new and clean heart. I invite you into my life. Teach me to do
everything You want me to do and to follow You all the days of my life. I
pray this believing in what Jesus did for me. Amen."
Getting to Know Jesus
After I prayed these words I felt a quiet, calming sense of peace.
In my mind I saw an image of me and Jesus where I was six years old. My long
brown hair was braided in two pigtails and Jesus was kneeling down with his
arms wrapped tightly around me. He was stroking my hair. I was clinging to
him, hugging him and looking up at him as he smiled at me. I knew I had
come home!
Before, I had always been on a search for something to fill this empty
void in my life. I tried filling it with drugs, alcohol, sex, with
whatever I could to get a feeling of pleasure and self-worth. Now Jesus
fills that void. After I read the New Testament, and Jesus became the
reason and focus of my life, I began to see the world differently. It was
as if someone had lifted the veil covering my eyes and I finally understood
the truth about what my existence in this life really means.
Faith and Freedom
For so long I had thought that Christianity was a means of control, with
lots of rules of what you can and can’t do. Yet, it turns out that by
giving my life to Jesus the opposite happened and I am finally FREE! I am
no longer a slave to sin. Now I have the power to make the right choices
for the right reasons, to honor God.
My Dad told me that he had known about my drug use and was watching my
life unravel. He had felt so helpless, and at that time he begged for God’s
help. He told me that he prayed to God, saying that he would give up
anything and everything he owned to have me back to how I used to be. His
prayers were answered! Here I was strong and full of joy, speaking about
how God had changed my life, full of confidence and love. I was completely
transformed. God had answered his prayer tenfold. At that moment he knew
that God truly did exist. In a very short time, my parents and my brother
have also become followers of Jesus.
Although my spiritual walk with Jesus has been brief, I have complete trust
in God. I have exposed my vulnerability and weaknesses in order for God to
use me to serve others. I will use my past hurts, struggles and weaknesses
to help others as God sees fit. God created me as I am and my history has
become part of His purpose. My personality and strengths are a result
of His love for me.
Take a look at your life. How would you describe it? Contented?
Rushed? Exciting? Stressful? Moving forward? Holding back? For many of us
it’s all of the above at times. There are things we dream of doing one day,
there are things we wish we could forget. In the Bible, it says that Jesus
came to make all things new. What would your life look like if you could
start over with a clean slate?
Living with hope
If you are looking for peace, there is a way to balance your life. No
one can be perfect, or have a perfect life. But every one of us has the
opportunity to experience perfect grace through a personal relationship with
God through His Son, Jesus Christ.
You can receive Christ right now by faith through prayer. Praying is
simply talking to God. God knows your heart and is not so concerned with
your words as He is with the attitude of your heart. Here's a suggested
prayer:
Lord Jesus, I want to know you personally. Thank you for dying on the
cross for my sins. I open the door of my life to you and ask you to come in
as my Savior and Lord. Take control of my life. Thank you for forgiving my
sins and giving me eternal life. Make me the kind of person you want me to
be.
Does this prayer express the desire of your heart? You can pray it right
now, and Jesus Christ will come into your life, just as He promised.
Is this the life for you?
If you invited Christ into your life, thank God often that He is in your
life, that He will never leave you and that you have eternal life. As you
learn more about your relationship with God, and how much He loves you,
you'll experience life to the fullest.”
CLICK HERE TO GET TO KNOW JESUS FOR YOURSELF You'll be glad you did!
______________COME
TO JESUS NOW______________
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Jesus
Who is Jesus?
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